One Year In

It’s been almost a full year since I officially became divorced. I don’t get to remember the day I got divorced because it was on February 29th during leap year of 2016 to be exact. But while I don’t get to revisit THAT day one year ago, the lessons I have learned in the days since have been life-changing, and evolutionary at best.  

This past year has been a major year of transition for me and I would say that the lessons I have learned, and still learning, have helped me to realize more and more, WHO I AM as a person. I have done more reflecting in the past year than I have done in my entire life. I have gotten to know the post-marriage me, the single-mom me, and yet and still, I feel like who I really am is also being fully rediscovered... journey-style, not sprint-style.

I have thought about writing about my experience for a while because that’s what writers do…we write. Every day, I asked myself what can I say? I didn’t want to speak publicly until I had something to share that would be encouraging, insightful, but also raw and real. I wanted to share what no one else tells you when you search in Google. 

Unlike my usual buttoned up and professional writing, that’s totally NOT what this is. A therapeutic, completely raw account of my experience is what this is. Me expressing myself unstructured.

I pray my words will resonate and help you.  Read the story on Medium here.

Why You Can't Stay On Track

I am sure you set goals for the new year, right?

Whether you set them at the end of last year or the first week of this year, time has passed and you've already gotten off track. Nope, not looking in your window, but I know that most of us who set goals rarely achieve them without having gotten off track at least once.

So I began to ponder, why do we get off track? And a train track came to mind. 

Then I thought about this: some people get off track and never reach their destination, because they were never supposed to be taking a train to get there in the first place.

So let's assume in your business, you have many ways of getting to your destination. Your destination could be more clients, more products, more sales, hiring team, expanding, etc. There are many ways for you to get there, but you decide to the take the train. And then you are chugging along and then you get off track. 

But what if you were never supposed to be taking a train to get to your destination? Now you're all off track with no hopes of getting back on track...all because you didn't choose the right mode of transportation.

Maybe you were supposed to take a plane. Some of you were meant to take a bus. Others were meant to walk. And what's so crazy about those of you who were meant to take a walk to get to your destination, is that you were closer to your destination than you thought when you set out on the journey.

Knowing which mode of transportation you should take helps you stay on track. So how do I know which mode  of transportation I should take Coach Fon?

Easy. 

Take the best mode that will get you there. 

I know. You're probably staring at the screen like...what does that mean?

It simply means, don't take the road that you KNOW will take forever to get you there.

If your business destination is more clients, then ask yourself what will get you a client today, not a month from now (THIS IS A PLANE)

If your business destination is hiring a team, then choose the route that will allow you enough time to think about who you want, what you need for them to do, where they are most likely hanging out at, and also give yourself enough time to interview people more than once. (THIS IS A CAR). But some of you want to hire people immediately, which metaphorically speaking means you're in plane mode vs car mode).

Bottomline...depending on your destination, you should always carefully choose the best mode of transportation to get you there. That means don't just run off and get a train ticket when you need to be filling your car up with gas :-)

Your Action Step:

Write down where you're trying to go and what steps it will take you to get there. Then think about what could get you off track. Then choose the best way to get there the quickest. 

Remember, the sooner you get there, the less chance you have of getting off track!!!

P.S. I also recorded a podcast episode on this very topic! Check it out here!!!

Consistency Matters More Than Length

 

 

It's the first Monday of 2017 and I am super excited about January! I love fresh starts. They symbolize another chance. And who doesn't like another chance, right? All of the morning talk shows are talking about starting the year off right with exercise and eating better...the USUAL new year topics, but I think right after talking about starting, you want to immediately commit to being consistent.

Yesterday my pastor at church said Consistency seems to matter more than length. He was talking about praying for 40 days straight (yep, our church is doing a 40 Day Prayer Challenge), but he made it about to mention how consistency matters more than length. That means, instead of focusing on how LONG I pray, my goal is simply to pray first thing in the morning daily. So that means some mornings, I may pray for 5 minutes, and some mornings I may pray for 5 seconds. What matters most is that I DO IT every single day.

I thought about how this can apply to other areas of my life and my business. What do I need to commit to, that regardless of how much time I give it, just the mere fact of doing it everyday will make an impact and create a solid habit. Here are a few things I thought I could commit to doing consistently:

  • Writing - Now for all of 2016, I talked a lot about how I needed to write more. It's not even a hard task for me to do. I never really get writer's block if I just write how I talk. LOL. Because seriously, no one gets "talker's block." But for some reason, I didn't write consistently. Why not? Because I didn't commit to doing it simply. So applying the same logic from above, I am going to write everyday, even if I only write one word. But guess what? I am long-winded (as you probably noticed already), so I know that committing one word automatically means at least 10 words.
  • Eating Fruit - I have gone from Super Shred with Dr. Ian to the 10 Day Smoothie Cleanse Challenge to nothing. After the challenge or the timeframe had passed on each of these, I fell back into donuts, fast food, and chips and guac. YAAASSSSS, this girl loves her avocado! But again, what if I applied the consistency matters more than length concept and just said, I am going to eat one piece of fruit everyday. They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away, so why not test the theory with apples, bananas, oranges, grapes, etc. One piece of fruit a day. I can totally do that. So much easier than thinking about all the fruit I need to make a fruit smoothie. P.S. I can't stand grocery shopping. 
  • Love - Last year, I found myself fussing a whole lot with my kids. I tell them I love them every day, but what else could I be doing to show them love vs saying it? Going back to the consistency matters more than length, I could spend 1 minute hugging them with no words. Hugs always make people feel good, whether you're the giver or the receiver. 

Alright, so let's take a look at what I have committed to doing daily: praying immediately when I get up for a minimum of 1 second, writing one word, eating one piece of fruit, and hugging each of my children for one minute straight. Doing these things consistently will give me the momentum to pray longer, write more, eat healthier, and love more passionately.

I can do this! 

What about you?

What can you commit to doing consistently? Leave a comment below and let me know so I can hold you accountable.